We’ve all heard that the definition of insanity is: “the act of doing something over and over again, expecting a different result”. While this isn’t the real definition (it’s actually a quote attributed to Albert Einstein), it makes perfect sense to all of us. If you’re running at a wall, hoping to pass through it, chances are you’ll stop after just a few tries if you don’t get the desired results (especially if you’re sprinting).
I generally see people saying this to others in regards to relationships. If your significant other isn’t treating you the way they used to or the way that you deserve, your friend is quick to point out what might be going on. When we take a step back (if we ever want to), we generally see that maybe our friend’s words did have some value after all.
Personally, I believe that there are significantly more things that we have ‘insanity’ tendencies towards than just in relationships. I know that I have this kind of relationship with food; I know binge eating my feelings isn’t a good idea and leads into a vicious cycle, but I still catch myself thinking about pasta sometimes. Oh pasta. You cruel temptress.
No. I believe that most of us (if not all of us) need to take a step back and look at the things that we think about ourselves, especially the thoughts that prevent us from moving forward.
Break Up with Self-Doubt
Yes! Self doubt! Bet you didn’t see breaking the massive brick-wall of self doubt coming. Our actions border on insane towards this made up thing – because yes, it’s something entirely made up. We are our own biggest critics. From scolding ourselves for gaining weight, to blaming ourselves for ‘failures’ that haven’t even happened yet, we treat self doubt like it’s something trustworthy.
Self doubt is a liar. Think about it; every time that your mind has told you “ehhh I don’t know if we can do that thing,” when you get down to it, you can do it. Sometimes this discovery catapults us into motivation-kicking-ass mode. Other times, we just internalize that we are good at that one particular thing, that this lesson doesn’t apply to the other areas of our lives. This couldn’t be further from the truth though.
Our minds create our reality and dictate what we can and can not do. But we can control our minds. Numerous studies have proven that when we tell ourselves “we can’t do that”, that task (no matter what it is) is more difficult than it would’ve been otherwise. And when we tell ourselves “well of course I can do this, because I’m a badass Goddess and I’m awesome” (or however you want to say it) our mind turns that into our reality. We can. And we do.
It’s Time to Move On
When things don’t work for us, we usually take the hint (eventually, sometimes) and try another way or create a new plan. But day after day we allow things like self doubt, negative self-talk, and small anxieties to make decisions in our lives that we may not actually want.
**I want to take a moment to address mental health in regards to self doubt. Yes, sometimes we really can’t help these thoughts and the places that our mind wants to send us. And no, self- doubt isn’t something you can have a nice sit-down, productive chat with. But. As you begin to come between yourself and the negative things that roll through your mind, you can start taking your power back. You’ll see that it’s easier to ignore those thoughts or to change that pattern when it starts to arise.**
Take back your power. Believe in yourself. Everything you need is already inside you, you just have to see it and feel it. Start by breaking up with self-doubt. Promise yourself that you’re going to stop wasting your own time, that you won’t allow yourself to stop yourself ever again!